Emotional Intelligence Pop-Quiz
One of the fastest ways to reduce productivity is to lose it emotionally. It’s been shown that emotional intelligence (EQ) far exceeds the importance of IQ.
How many times has something happened that got you emotionally wound up and it zapped your energy, stole your creativity or damaged a working relationship. It happens all the time.
Emotional Intelligence is: “the capacity for recognizing our own feelings and those of others, for motivating ourselves, for managing emotions well in ourselves and in our relationships.” – Daniel Goleman
One of the best immediate ways to immediately increase your emotional intelligence is to simply create a habit of asking, “What’s the rest of the story?” whenever things happen BEFORE you engage emotionally.
Emotional Intelligence Pop-Quiz:
You’re driving straight home from the dealership with your brand new dream car when suddenly a boy on the side of the road throws a large rock and hits the side of your car, obviously putting a dent in the door.
1) How do you feel right now?
2) What do you do?
a – Pull over and talk the boy!
b- Pull over and #%*!@ the boy!
c- Keep driving home and pretend it didn’t happen!
d- Keep driving home and share with your spouse and others the terrible thing that happened and what an awful boy that kid is!
e- Keep driving home and call the police or child’s parents!
Here’s the rest of the story… You choose to pull over and before you can say anything the boy yells to you, “I’m so sorry about hitting your car but I didn’t know what else to do! My brother is just over the this ridge. He has had a terrible crash on his bike and he isn’t moving. I didn’t know how else to get someone to stop and help! Will you please help him?!”
How you do you feel now?
Amazing what the rest of the story instantly does for you, isn’t it? Now think back to your earlier answer on what you would have done – a, b, c, d, e – which did you choose? What effects would your response have led to? Would they have been appropriate given the whole story?
Commit to creating a habit that when things happen, you immediately engage the thought, “I wonder what’s the rest of the story?” This thought allows you to keep you emotions in check rather than just being a walking reaction to the world around you.
You may not be able to raise your IQ but you are certainly able to grow your EQ! And, by doing so, you’ll change not only your life but the lives of those around you as well.
I can understand his frustration initially, but once he changed the way he was looking at the world around realizing others had needs too. It wasn’t just about him only. I got emotional watching this clip; It reminds me I need to stop complaining about the little stuff. Thanks for the reminder.
Thanks for this. This is very intriguing. The natural reaction would be to get very upset, and curse the kid, and even inflict some harm, but it certainly isn’t the most intelligent thing to do.
We all have a gift of will power that we can use to react to any situation in a way that is constructive, not destructive. Someone using their will power would be someone who chooses to be happy when their favorite sporting team loses. Someone just reacting would get very upset when their favorite sporting team loses.
Personally, I initially would have liked my reaction to be C, although it probably would have been B or D if I’m totally honest. In any of those cases, I wouldn’t have been able to help the boy.
Thanks again for sharing a great insight,
That’s a great question! I really enjoyed the video too… it was moving.
The other day my son and I were driving, listening to the radio when one of the DJ’s started talking about people. “What is with people…” and my son asked me to turn it off.
He said it really bothers him when people start talking about being annoyed with others, and they don’t even know what’s going on in that person’s life, why they might actually be doing what they’re doing.
I thought it was great insight, and this post reminded me of that. Summing it up with a question we can ask at those times can be a real help.
Thank you for sharing.
i love this story….it teaches us not to judge nor do anything bad immediately….reacting some things that you do not know the real reason is mistakable….may all people have more patience and understandings….
wow, that one hit me. Thanks for sharing.
The question:”What is the rest of the story ?” is very powerful. It will prevent us from judging and engaging emotionally.
Chances are we never get the entire picture, but this question will remind us that there still might be something else about this person we don’t know.
I appreciate your thoughts Oliver!
I love this! Thanks for sharing!